BARGAIN IN BUSINESS Scene: Outside a shop, midday sun blazing. You’re chilling, minding your own business, waiting for someone.

Kabla hata ujue, a Maasai guy anakatia corner, kashika belts kama 12 kwa mkono moja na zile confidence za mtu ako na PhD ya kuuza kwa jua. Maasai: “Belts! Strong genuine leather! Hii ni ya 600 bob tu!” A guy who looks like he Googled “how to bargain like a Nairobian” once, anakam steady. Buyer (with unnecessary swagger): “Aaah, 600? Wewe unajua hii belt ni ya 200, na hiyo ni generous.” Maasai (laughing like he’s heard this 1,000 times): “200? Mbona ningeacha Nyumbani kuja Nairobi nikugawie stock? Nipe 500 basi.”

Buyer (raising eyebrows like he's at an auction): “Haya, 250 mwisho. Sina ng'ombe hapa na siwezi nunua belt na mortgage.” Maasai (crosses arms, looks him dead in the eyes): “Apana. Leta 400 mwisho. Hii belt si ya kufunga ndoto, ni ya kufunga suruali.” I was in the background, sipping soda, trying not to laugh out loud as this negotiation becomes a spiritual experience. In Nairobi, si unauza tu, ni performance. 😎 And if you're not bargaining, are you even Kenyan and as a business person have you ever came across such people 🤔